Improve your life - control your anger

Do you or perhaps someone you know suffer from their anger? Do you suffer from road rage? Maybe the behaviour of others infuriates you and leaves you seething? We know that such feelings are not good for us and leads to stress.  So how to control that temper?

In Islam, it is considered a virtue for a Muslim to control his/her anger and temper. But how to do this? Well here are three remedies Islam prescribes for anger...

1. Say "I seek protection from the accursed devil (shaytaan)".
2. Drink a glass of water / perform ablution (perform ritual wash before prayers).
3. Sit down or lie down.

I was in a terrible temper one day and when I considered the above remedies for anger I thought there is no way that these actions will calm me down. After thinking such a thought I decided to try these remedies - what I found shocked me - my anger and temper dissipated.

Accordingly, the next time you or someone close to you has uncontrollable anger I would suggest that you try the3 above mentioned remedies. I am sure you will be surprised with the outcome.  For me, I simply couldn't sustain my anger while sat down, sipping water from a glass.

When I researched this subject more I found many articles showing that simply drinking water can cool our tempers. Here is one such article...

Islam teaches you to appreciate what you have

Usually my writings on this blog are inspired by refuting some negative remark about Islam so for this post I thought I would offer an insight into the religion which I hope will depict Islam in a positive light and which I hope will be of benefit to all readers irrespective of their belief.

How often do we consider our lives and think that we are hard done by? How often do we suffer setbacks and feel sad, depressed and despondent? I would imagine that all of us have feelings of sadness from time to time and that on occasions we feel that we are generally worse off than perhaps we should be.  We all have issues, problems, worries and I am sure that we probably worry about the same things, health, wealth, relationships etc.

So what is the Islamic perspective on this?  In general, the Qur'an prescribes Mankind to be grateful for what he has, to be thankful to Allah for what Allah has provided and in this context Mankind should not worry - indeed worry has no benefit.  I am sure you will agree with this - has worrying ever made any of your problems better?

Surah Al An'am (6) Ayat 17

"If Allah touches you with harm no one can remove it except He, and if He touches you with good, then he is able to do all things"

Indeed, the Qur'an notes that Mankind, by their very nature are ungrateful.  Surah Ar Rahman (55) repeats "Then which of the blessings of your Lord will you deny".

Is this true? Are we in denial of the blessings of our Lord?  Or is it that our lives are truly miserable and there is nothing to be thankful for? I mean look at the suffering in the World? Should we be thankful for this? What of when we lose a close family member? Lose our job? Lose our health should we be thankful for this?

To assess whether we should be thankful I would like you to try out the following exercise:

Imagine in front of you a large piece of paper. You have a pen in your hand and I would like you to draw a vertical line in the middle of the paper creating two sections. Label the section on the left hand side reasons not to be grateful and on the right hand side reasons to be grateful.

Write away. List whatever you feel should go on either side of the piece of paper.

I am sure when you complete the exercise you will come to a conclusion as to how your life is.  I am sure some people who are going through a difficult time at the moment will think that their life is particularly difficult and perhaps on balance nothing to be grateful for.

But wait a minute? Did we do the exercise properly? Did we properly record all the items we should be grateful for? Did we list gratefulness for our eyesight? Sense of smell? Taste, touch, kidney, heart, ability to think, ability to walk, ability to move. Did we list all of our relationships, our family members, our close friends? Did we list all of our capabilities?

To put this into perspective, what if we move a benefit such as a physical ability or a relationship from the right hand side to the left hand side of the page and assume we no longer have it? I am sure for most of us the movement of that item will become the biggest problem on the list on the left hand side of the page.

The point I am trying to make is that by our nature we are ungrateful for what we have - we take it for granted.  But as soon as we lose it, we miss it terribly. Just like our families and our relationships. How we take each other for granted. The beauty of the Qur'an is that it encourages us to ponder and contemplate what we have not least so that we can enjoy it while it is here. The Qur'an also teaches us that what we have in this World will leave us so we need to prepare for this however such preparation doesn't mean worry ourselves silly - no - we should reflect on the life we have led and have enjoyed - we should be thankful to Allah and pray for a better life in the Hereafter.

What I find so attractive and appealing about this aspect of Islam - being thankful - is that when you reflect on what you have and that you only have it for a finite period of time - you will feel grateful - you will (or should) feel that there is no benefit to worrying and fretting.

To give another example, a close relative that you love dearly. We can rage against losing such a person but why not reflect on the happy times you spent together? Don't waste your time worrying about what you don't have or what you might lose - use your time now to enjoy what you have.

Is Snapchat Satanic?

As a Muslim, as a believer, I belive in the "unseen". Part of the "unseen" is the world of the jinn and Satan (Iblis) and his jinn (demon) followers. The difficulty for a believer in such things is how to verify their existence? Can we prove the "unseen" exists? Certainly, an inability to prove something "unseen" doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Until our understanding of science developed we were unable to prove the existence of "unseen" things such as gravity and magnetism.

In this light I was disturbed to see Snapchat's recent introduction of allowing users to video themselves vomiting rainbows. I will say that again, vomiting rainbows. Maybe I am too old to understand (I am in my 40s) but why would someone want to see themselves vomiting a rainbow? The zombie face, I can understand. Change your appearance and shock your friends and family. But vomiting rainbows? What does it mean?

As far as I could find out vomiting rainbows means you find something too sweet - sickly sweet. Ok. But is this such a popular thing that it is added as a feature to Snapchat? Obviously it is. So why do people want to show themselves vomiting rainbows? The most popular answer I received to this question is that it is "fun". Really? This is fun? Maybe I don't have the right sense of humour to see the "fun" here.

Actually, I find the image shocking and, to me, Satanic. This depiction is what I imagine a demon to look like. I think this is the popular image that we all think a demon looks like. But how, have we ever seen a real demon?

Why do we think that demons have horns and big eyes? Just fantasy? We made it up? Collectively?

What about vomiting? I cannot think of anything positive about this. Of course the symbolism is unpleasant.

What I find strange is why would anyone want to depict themselves like this? Ok, maybe a few people perhaps, but such a number that it warrants its own application on Snapchat? Wow. This led me to thinking how did this come about. Certainly, to me, the depiction looks Satanic, it makes people look like demons. I have two thoughts on this. Say the "unseen" is true - that there really are demons - wouldn't they want their natural enemy - humankind - to depict themselves as demons? Who knows?

Putting the demonic copying to one side - isn't it that this is truly a waste of time? Does anyone need to send to another person a picture of themselves vomiting a rainbow?  In Islam, we believe that one of the tricks of Satan (Iblis) is to waste our time - preoccupy us with irrelevant and foolish matters. I think anyone reading this article who has teenage children will agree that whilst smart phones are incredible devices with very many wonderful uses - how often do our children waste their time with pointless activities on them? Could there be a more pointless activity than showing yourself vomit a rainbow?

One thing we can all agree on is that our time on Earth is limited. Again, we can agree we should use our time constructively and usefully. I don't think there is time for depicting ourselves vomiting a rainbow.

Chapter 10 - The God Delusion Richard Dawkins - A Much Needed Gap

In the final chapter of the book Professor Richard Dawkins makes the point that the idea of God fills a gap in our lives in the same way that an imaginary friend fills a gap in the life of a child. Again, no scientific evidence for this - more of a thought and certainly not persuasive in putting across the view that belief in God is delusional.

Professor Dawkins then refers to the burka (a form of Islamic dress for women) and makes the point that while such form of dress covers the body except for a small slit for the eyes then this image can be used to show the similarity of a mind which excludes science. A bizarre analogy to me as it presupposes that Muslims have no belief in science (not true). Again, no science to support this point and again no real argument to support the title of the book whether a belief in a God is a delusional belief.

Professor Dawkins has a shot at the burka saying it is an instrument of oppression. Again, no evidence given for this. What clothing would be suitable or appropriate Professor Dawkins does not say. If a burka covers most of the body and therefore is a symbol or restricting the mind is a bikini a symbol of great learning and enlightenment? What about people in cold countries don't they need to cover up to keep warm? Are they also uneducated because of covering up?

A disappointing end to an interesting book.  Certainly, I am not convinced that a belief in a God (any God for that matter) is delusional per se. In fact, Professor Dawkin's acknowledgement of a possible existence of a God who made the laws of physics tells me that it is clear there isn't proof to say there is no God and it therefore follows that you cannot say that belief in God is delusional.  

Chapter 9 - The God Delusion - Childhood, Abuse and the Escape from Religion

Professor Richard Dawkins starts this chapter with a story about a girl set in the 1850s who was taken from her Jewish parents because she had been baptised by a maid and the result was that she was not allowed to be brought up by her parents - in turn Professor Dawkins expresses dismay about how the parents would't renounce their faith and become Catholic at least just for the sake to be reunited with their daughter - the conclusion - religion is bad and I guess it follows there is no God.  No science in this - a bit disappointing.

Professor Dawkins continues to question the practice of parents bringing up their children a particular religion and suggests that this is akin to child abuse.  He also seems to play down sexual abuse generally and in particular child abuse by Catholic priests and suggests that teaching about hell is perhaps a greater form of abuse.  Indeed, Professor Dawkins refers to the abuse he suffered and notes he has long forgiven the abuser.

In summary, I didn't find any science in this chapter to suggest that belief in God is delusional. With regard to Professor Dawkins' point that children should be taught to think for themselves and then decide for themselves - I think this is valid however you would have to expect that the parents/society will obviously tailor such education in what they think is in the best interests of the child. As a Muslim, I would certainly want my children to receive a broad education (obviously including science) but I would also want them to learn about my religion (Islam) as well as other religions. Certainly, Islam places on each individual the decision as to what they want to believe.

Chp 8 – The God Delusion – What’s wrong with religion? Why be hostile? – my initial thoughts

Chp 8 – The God Delusion – What’s wrong with religion? Why be hostile? – my initial thoughts

In this chapter Professor Dawkins explains why religion is not good for the World and gives a variety examples of where religion, in particular, fundamentalism and literal belief in holy books, has resulted in horrible acts. Professor Dawkins laments over the otherwise smart scientist who gives up a potentially successful life as a scientist because he believed the Old and New Testatments over scientific fact. Professor Dawkins also refers to terrorists acts such as 9/11 and the London bombings.

Professor Dawkins refers to the “dark side of absolutism” ….most dangerously so in the Muslim world”.  I was disappointed that the reference to the “Muslim world” isn’t supported with credible evidence other than references to the Taliban (Afghanistan), 9/11 and the London bombings. Certainly not a scientific approach but I would also add that I really do not think you can judge the Islamic faith by simply referring to a handful of terrorist acts and the failed state of Afghanistan that has been war torn for much of my life and has been the subject of proxy wars by other more powerful countries. Was Islam fine before 9/11, the Taliban and the London bombings?

Professor Dawkins concludes from the examples that he gives that “religion can be a force for evil in the world”. I don’t disagree but also it can be a force for good. Again, I was disappointed that there was insufficient evidence to support such conclusions. 

As I am writing my thoughts on this book and posting them to my blog one person who commented on my comments said that the God Delusion is like a “Turkey shoot” where you try to find logical and factual errors. I thought this was a harsh comment at the time but after reading chapter 8 I felt this comment had some validity to it. There are several incorrect (plainly wrong) and misleading references to Islam as follows –

1.     Prophet Muhammed did not invent Islam at the age of 40. Islam means submission to the will of God (Allah). Prophet Muhammed was a messenger following the long line of prophets who came to deliver the message to believe in God (Allah). This is what Muslims believe. It is incorrect to say that Islam was invented by Prophet Muhammed. Professor Dawkins is free to say this is what he thinks but this is not what Muslims think. A basic factual error.

2.     Professor Dawkins refers to the case in Pakistan where a man was questioned as to his motives to be a Muslim.  There is no validity to such questioning – it is known in Islam that no one knows the sincerity of another.

3.     Professor Dawkins likes assessing Islam by the seemingly outrageous law that apostates must be killed. As I understand it the death penalty for apostates is more akin to treason i.e. the disbelief has to be public and an overall threat to society and such punishment can only be sanctioned by the head of state. If someone disbelieves internally and privately no one would know. From my experience of living in the Middle East, I think there are lots of people who do not practice the religion, lots who don’t believe but nothing happens to them. There is no Islamic duty to kill apostates. This is another factual error. If someone kills someone else it is murder – simple as that.  Just like in the UK if a murderer tells us that God told him to kill, we don’t accept that as a basis to criticize religion – it shows the killer is a murderer and possibly insane.

4.     How does Professor Dawkins know that the Taliban takes the Quran literally? Why are the Taliban poster boys for the Islamic religion? In the Middle East we take no guidance or direction from the Taliban. Who are the Taliban anyway? How would Professor Dawkins analyse Islam before the Taliban?

5.     What Islamic fascist state is ardently sought? Most of my Muslim friends in the Middle East enjoying living and holidaying in the UK, Europe, the USA.

6.     Professor Dawkins refers to militant Muslims living in Britain who consider themselves bound by Islamic law and not the laws of the UK. Islamically, you are obliged to follow the laws of the land where you live.

7.     Referring to Sam Harris and how Sam Harris says the 19 bombers on the 9/11 planes believed the literal truth of the Koran – how does Sam Harris know this? Comical and certainly no evidence of there not being a God. Where has the scientific analysis gone?

8.     Again Sam Harris, and Sam’s interview with a failed suicide bomber – my understanding is that there are a variety of reasons for suicide bombing – mainly born out of fear, frustration, oppression and certainly this is not prescribed in Islam – of course no reference in the Quran to suicide bombing.

9.     Where are the contradictions in the Quran referred to by Sookdeo? Where in the Quran does it say any Muslim who denies terror is part of Islam is a disbeliever? Utter nonsense.

Overall, I was disappointed with this chapter. I certainly do not mind a critique of the Islamic religion but please a more well thought out critique based on an analysis of the texts and not just references to the Taliban, 9/11 and the London bombings. Also, to get back to the central theme of the book, where is the connection between instances of evil and the existence of a God? I don’t think any of the faiths/believers in a God ever suggested that a hallmark of God’s existence is an absence of evil. Isn’t the presence of evil part of the test God has set for us in this World? Anyhow, disappointed with this chapter for its lack of intellectual rigor. These are the types of arguments you would face from anyone.

How to enjoy your life and your job - Dale Carnegie

Whilst the subject of this blog is an examination of whether there is life after death I would certainly suggest that we also learn how to better enjoy our life and our jobs.  As an interlude to my review of The God Delusion by Professor Richard Dawkins I would like to recommend to readers of this blog the book "How to enjoy your life and your job" by Dale Carnegie. Easy to read and jam packed full of great ideas as to how you can live a happier life.  Whilst you might find that many suggestions are common sense there is no harm being reminded of these. I am sure that most readers will adopt at least a few suggestions and immediately better enjoy their life and job. I would definitely recommend this book and would suggest that it would make a good gift for anyone who needs cheering up.